Home early today.. after bio option. Good.. no brother to compete with me for the com heheh. Horrible la. Only had like.. one day to study this properly cuz all the important papers were before this. And I underestimated the amount of stuff to study yesterday.. Thought it would be kind of manageable then after took out the whole pile of option papers and it was like.. Damn. So much! Heh. So it was like.. everything outside human growth I just wrote crap. Good thing the essay was a bit human-ish. And a bit of O level knowledge. Seriously la everyone had only ONE DAY to study this thing.. So if people score.. it's also just how well they spot.. Most people anyway. Or those who are fortunate crappers. Ya.. so anyway.. *crosses fingers*.. Hope today is a lucky day for us all..

Getting a bit of competitive streak again. Which is good in a way.. It's quite motivating heheh.. Like there's a temporary sense of purpose. But for what is a different story. As in eventually.. ya.. get good A level results, go and work, get a good post and then what? There's like something missing in the picture. All these are all so materialistic. And pleasure or anything else related derived from these isn't very genuine in a way. Cuz it's just short-lived and can be easily lost. So what fills the gaps? But I guess I can only find out if I pull through As first huh.. Or I'll never be in the right frame of mind if I'm forever regretting what could have been done better..

And I guess there is something good out from this la. As melia was saying.. it's kinda fun mugging with everyone else. Didn't really think of that until she said. It's like.. a common vision.. Like what pm goh was saying he wanted singaporeans to have in our compre passage.. haha.. Ok that's a bit not related.. nevermind.. And there's also less pressure in a sense. As in.. now it's so much better to mug openly. Last time usually come early to school with all the unfinished tutorials but it felt so.. out.. to be doing tutorials when everyone else is talking and chatting. It also feels a bit discrimatory in a sense.. Or maybe it's because I was discriminating myself..? But now.. everyone's doing the same.

Ya anywayy.. must go and sleep!! Bleah.. all my sleeping hours are so weird and irregular now la. I'm getting horrendous wrinkles around my eyes!!! Think exams play a role in speeding up a reversible aging reaction.. Wrinkles, white hair.. See the signs of overstudying.. Heh. Well tomorrow is chem anyway.

5:16 am ·